Bored Talk : Volume 8 “Soap…and a few other musings”
Bored Talk : Volume 8
Soap…and a few other musings.
My world is filled with “other people”. As a matter of fact almost everyone I know is other people. Other people are usually just fine; fun to be around, family members, co-workers, friends and the like. But, as we all know, other people do all the really stupid and aggravating things that we see being done every day. Think about it…Road Idiots are always other people. Other people drive like maniacs; they speed up behind us and at the last second swerve to go around and then cut in front of us to take the off-ramp…Idiot! Other people never use cruise-control either, they just pass us like we’re backing up as we motor along at a nice cruise-controlled pace. Then 2 minutes later there they are in front of us on their cell phone yakking away probably ordering pizza as we motor by …the list could go on and on…like the incessant left turn blinker on that other guys car in front of me! Idiot! Making a left turn…other people will wait for an oncoming car that is obviously so far away that half a dozen cars could make the turn before it even gets close and yet they will wait til the road is clear for a mile before taking the plunge. Other people sit at a Green Light as if they are waiting on it to ripen. Other people are determined to do all of their most complicated banking transactions at the ATM. Other people go the wrong way in the Walmart parking lot to save a little time or get to that good space. You get my point… We don’t do these things. We’re not idiots! It’s always those other people!
Soap is something most of us use every day, other people might not (we know who you are), but the rest of us use it. There are 3 species of soap; Powdered, Liquid, and Bar. My issue is with the Bar variety. I love to crack open the little soap box ( how anyone could ever get up on one of those and propagate pious pontifications I’ll never know, but that’s another story ) and get that first aromatic whiff of cool sea breezes from the Coast or the fresh air of an Irish Spring, ahhh, just makes you want to get all lathered up and clean. And that’s what we do, we get in the shower and as the wonderful, sparkling droplets of steaming hot water rain down on our tired day-worn bodies we turn our stress lined faces into the soothing stream and with ecstatic relaxation washing over us we reach for that fresh bar of our favorite soap lying there in the soap dish…but all we feel in the dish is that wee wafer of skeletal remains from the previous bar! %^**#@$% We forgot to put the new bar in the shower!…Do we step out of our warm, watery cocoon to retrieve the fresh, fragrant, full of lathery goodness new bar? Or do we do what we always do and stay put under the sensuous, silvery flow and spend the next five minutes fumbling and fidgeting with the minuscule remnant to try and coax a modicum of lather onto our natural sea-sponge ( of course we all use natural sea-sponge to wash with, other people may not, but we do ) in hopes that we can get just one more washing out of the pale, cracked sliver of a once luxurious bar. After several goes at it we deem ourselves clean enough. If the slippery ort has survived we lay it to the side in a special place where all the other soap crumbs are laid to rest, waiting there to dissolve or turn to powder. I sometimes think that I may someday take all the soap remains and somehow reconstitute a complete bar…I wonder what it would smell like…The Coast of Ireland ?